Thursday, April 19, 2007
nothin can describe how much i miss her... how much i love her... even though she told me not to constrain myself from saying the 3 words, 'i love u...' but... part of me still tells myself tt i shouldnt say it too many times... it will defeat the purpose.. like how she said... anyway, in my heart... i'm telling her i love u almost every sec!! hehe.. i really do... i cant have anythin more wonderful than the love she gave me... i really feel so in love... this feeling is the most marverlous, wonderful, sensationalful.. lol.. got this words meh? anyway, i'm really very happy everyday when i noe tt i have her as my gf... though we're so far apart... but nothin is goin to change my love for her de...
i think this entry, nobody will see 1.. lol.. cause i've stop blogging for so long liao!! haha.. dear dear also give up hope on me liao.. lol... anyway, i dun plan to let any1 see it... i just want to show it to my bao bei when i go australia... i want to let her noe tt actually besides all the msg i sent her in friendster, all the stories i've tell her... i still write in blog about my feelings for her... i just cant control myself from stopping to love her so much... my heart just keeps telling me to just give my everythin for this relationship... she always say i put in too much for the relationship.. than she didnt put in as much.. but tt doesnt matter at all dear... cause i'm really really happy to put in so much... really!! hehe... dear... all these days while ure away... i have always tried to get stronger each day... i really do! but if i still didnt reach ur expectation, plz dun get angry or disappointed in me k...? love me as who i am k? of course i'll change for the better... so.. not to worry bout tt k?
dear... its so late now le.. tml i still got to go NKF.. stupid NKF.. ah... think i better turn in now... dear dear... I love u so much!!! when talking to u i cant say... but i wanna say it here!! cause i noe no body will come see 1... yan lin bao bei!!!! I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!!I love u so much!!! hehe... i really do!!! my love for u will nv end de... take good care my love... Wan an.... see u in my dreams!!! hehe..
12:44 AM
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
eh.... how long i didnt blog liao huh.... hee.. its like eh... 2 months le.. wow.. time files.. during this period of time, there are many events that occur that i didnt tell u.. on 30th august.... i went to chalet with linlin... it was all so happy and wonderful... we met up and took bus together to pasir-ris... hehe.. after which, we settle down and just relax... tt silly dear... wanted to give me a surprise.. she planned with meiqi in the dark to hold a bbq just outside our chalet.. then those fuckers come... haha.. pour the freaking cream on me.. ah!!! it smells like milk at first then it smell like vomit ah... wtf... but i was shocked and got shocked till very happy... mark, dicky, weng shit, jordan, edwin, andy, xiang long all came.. we had so much fun.... the planning was made by linlin and meiqi one... thank you so so much..... at nitez, when everybody went home, me and linlin slept together... so sweet... dun worry... we didnt do anythin much... cause she dun let... wahahaha.. hai... anyway, i didnt mind.. i am just happy to the shit hole max with her around with me.. the nitez pass by very quickly and we checked out the second day...
on 2nd of sept, it was my birthday!!! me and linlin went to escape theme park to play!! haha.. very long nv go play these things liao... we rode the car together and race... hehe... of course i won la... but she also not bad leh... hehe.. we dunno sit how many times pirate ship.. every time my heart feel like jumping out... haha.. i didnt show it outside cause i want save face ma.. got other ppl.. but inside, i actaully screaming like fuck.. it was so fun.. everythin she did with me made me feel just so in love... hee... jealous rite??? but she really very nice to me la.. although she will throw temper on me sometimes.. and we quarrel sometimes.. but tts part of the relationship wat.. rite? quarreling with her always makes me feel so sad.. hai.. but nvm la... as long as we forgive and forget can liao.. tts wat couples should do rite?? rite now, we're still the same.. as sweet as before... she's the best thing that ever happen to me....
there are some other events tt happen also la... but lazy to say sia... currently i'm in my the other stopover in tep liao.. now i'm in KM. haha.. song ah here.. everyday play game... but i tell u.. i play till quite sick sometimes leh... 8 hours in sch.. play all the way.. haha wtf rite? here, i met alot of friends.. hehe.. all of them so fun to hang out with.. all very easy going... i still scared tt i may not get used of other classes in the first place ah... but heng la... hehe... oh.. ya.. i also wanted to tell u one thing.. there was once, i dunno y.. i suddenly exploded when 3 guys stared at me.. i really regret doing that u noe... hai.. i am also so short temper... and i find it hard to control myself when i'm angry... i need to control my temper... i very long nv explode so suddenly liao... i can recall that the last time i did tt was in sec sch days.. thats y i every year also will have one fight at least de... i told myself i wont go create trouble for myself le... but... tt day.. i nearly go punch those guys again.. lucky i didnt... if not i sure regret more de....
today is my 7th month with linlin... hehe... very fast... but she still got fyp to do after sch... tt means i will only get to meet her at nitez.. but nvm la.. as long as got see her can le.... planned to go watch movie later with her... hehe... time really flies... i hope tt it will pass by slower... cause next year, maybe lin will go aus study le... i will wait for her to come back de.... linlin ah... i wont stop u from goin to do the things u want... but i will miss u like siao here 1 loh... hee.. all i can do now is to treasure u every single day till u leave... dear dear.... see u later!! miss ya~~
11:29 AM
Friday, July 28, 2006
time passes by so quickly.. bao bei and i five months le.. its like we've been together for only a while... its like i can still rem noeing her in pri sch... the same class we were together then.. she always look so cute... even till now.. i'm really a lucky bastard to have her by my side.. i just read her blog.. feel kind of sad.. cause she say she cant wait to go oversea so quickly... y.....? if she goes, wont she miss me? i'll miss her like fuck every single day if she goes de... i may be very selfish if i dun allow her to go.. but if she really manage to go there, i'll surport her all the way.. she's really very nice to me... and i will nv take advantage of tt... i want her everyday to be happy and happier.. i cant help her much in sch... but i can do every other thing with her just to make her happy... i'm really willing to do it...
dear ah.. i really hope u wont get bored of me so fast... dun be so sick of ur life k? dun expect too many things for urself... ure only human.. dun always stress urself too much k? can learn abit from me in slacking in life... there's alot of crappy things u can do.. slowly find interest in doing the things u dun usually do, like tt, u can waste alot of time de... i'll go find u whenever i'm free de.. i'll defitenitly try my best to find u everyday de... i'll always be by ur side if ever u needed some1... dun feel alone k? for freindship part, i can be ur best friend as well ma.. can crap with me.. and at the same time, be sweet to me.. hehe... like tt good rite? u make me wanna be different... i'm not the boring and lazy guy i used to be le.. really... now, i'll try my best to do my things well and dun disappoint u... no one will ever take ur place in my heart de... u have already filled up 80% in my heart liao leh.. hehe.. my heart is so big and yet u can fill up so much space in it... like tt very powerful le u noe? hehe..
everyday passes by w/o even realising it... we muz jia you together for a better future k? life is really very unpredictable.. i may involve in any accident anytime.. no one noes... so, we muz love each other to the fullest every single day k? i may not be as good as others... but, i'll defitenitly love u more then any other ppl can do... i dunno y i'm falling so deeply for u.. my heart just tell me to do so.. it tells me to protect u from harm, to give u happiness, to give u all the good things in this world... and also, to give myself to u.. i noe tt if next time, if ever u dun want me anymore, i'll feel really hurt.. and i might not be able to stand up for a long period of time.. but tt doesnt matter... cause i just want is the present... which is now.... even if tml u dun want me anymore, i wont blame u... i'll not regret any shit tt i've done or did not do.. bao bei ah... dun ever feel scared to love me too much k? i may not be as good lookin as others, i may not be as good as ur other ex... but there's 1 thing i'm really really certain about.. and that is, i wont be not truthful to u.. i wont lie about the love i have for u.. u understand ma....? no matter wad the future may be, u'll always have me de.. promise!!!! u see huh.. i say promise le... so muz believe hoh... put more faith in me.. i wont disappoint u like ur past... i wont make u feel like shit like how u used to be.. cause.. i'll nv want a single day of ur life to be miserable again.. trust me k....? bao bei.. i love u... happy 5 months and 1 day anniverary..
3:48 AM
Monday, July 03, 2006
its 2:17am now. i should be slpin.. haha.. but dunno y.. still cant get to slp.. noe my bao bei is slping so soundly now... just now at her house still acc her slp.. ahe look sooooo sweet when she's slping.. love u dear..
we may be quarreling past 2 days.. but today is so nice rite? still took nicole down for a walk.. i noe ure moody past few days.. i'm only sad because i'm of no help to u.. instead, i made u feel worse.. sorry dear... all i wish is for u to get well real soon... i love u.. u noe it.. take good care of urself k? if not, i'll nag u non stop de... hehe.. wish u get well soon!! i want the baobei who likes to disturb me always to come back soon!! miss ya always... nitez!!
2:21 AM
Saturday, June 17, 2006
let me write a poem for everybody.
i am useless, i am dumb.
i am not rich, i am stupid.
i'm a bustard, i am fuck.
i'm jealous of others, and i suck.
i let ppl down, and make them sad.
i am shitty, and i'm worthless.
my brain thinks alot, and it hurts like hell.
my heart is tearing, and i wan to smash them up.
besides smashin my brain, there's 1 more thin i wanna smash.
and that is my fucking little testicles that cant stop a shit!!!!
hahaha.. thats the fucking annoying chee bye bustard me!! cheers~~ hahahahahahaha..
1:54 AM
Monday, June 12, 2006
its been so so long since i last blog le.. hehe... just now i still got difficulty finding my password and username to log in ah.... hahaha... now its 1.50am. last friday, i went genting with lin lin and her family.. it was so much fun!!!! but always.. happy moments always pass by so quickly de... but nvm la.. there'll be so many more chances de... i want to go holiday with my baobei again!!! i miss the past few days so so much... on thursday, i went to meet lin lin after sch at 6p.m. then we went bukit gombak i think.. west mall to buy some stuffs.. i still rem i was so hungry at that time.. hehe.. after that we came to my house and dear dear help me in packing my bag to go genting. hehe.. went to her house for dinner and pack her bag together. after which i spend the 1st nite over at her house and the ting zhang. hehe.. her living room actually very nice to slp loh.. w/o nicole of course. hehe.. cause it'll surely attack me de.. haha.. wake up at around 4.45 and got ready to set off to genting!!! her dad was a very good driver loh. he drove for so so long.. every1 fell aslp in the car.. i tried to stay awake so that i can peep at my silly baobei while she's slping. hehe.. dear.. ure really really very the cute when ure slping leh.. hee.. the 1st place we went to play was sunway lagon. i played in the lazy river and the slides with zu xiang and lin lin.. at 1st, that silly gal say dun wan her hair to get wet.. haha.. play in water wear can stay dry de.... hai.. sometimes she really very cute loh... then in the end, the 1 with the hair most wet 1 is her.. haha.. after that we went to eat. then Vroom!! off we go to genting liao. we got there around evenin time. 6 plus i think. went to check in then put our bags at the room 1st. the door no. was 23726 and 23727 i think.. hehe.. although the room was not very big, but it was cozy and nice.. dunno leh.. with baobei, everythin seems just so wonderful... hehe.. 1st day, we went to eat, then her parents went casino. then we go walk walk. the place was so cooling and nice... ah.... miss that place so much.. on the 2nd day, we went to the themepark. haha.. its been quite sometimes since i played all those things le.. instead of screaming when i'm on the lying down rollercoaster, i kept on laugh. cause i was just so happy.. hehe... zu xiang enjoyed himself too i think. and i really hope lin lin also enjoy.. i can say i laugh throughout my 2nd day. hehe.. after that, we went to eat. then go sing songs!! hehe.. very long didnt sing with her le.. i enjoyed so much singing with her and also listenin to her sing... just feel like kissing her after every song she sang.. after singin, we went to play arcade!! haha.. play datona together and got a high score there.. hehe.. then bao bei say i played that game grow up 1.. where got la... i so long didnt play le loh.. hehe... after that, we went back to the room and slp... 3rd day. had breakfast at starbucks. it was so so nice loh.. only baobei, me and zu xiang. her parents went to chiong casino for the last day. hehe.. her parents very cute also leh... hahaha.. we went to ripley's believe it or not.. haha.. it was so amazing loh.. we had our shadows put on the wall.. i held her hands and raised my left leg. that was my pose in that shadow. haha.. after that we went to walk a thing.. dunno wats tt.. i walk till damn giddy loh.. haha.. cant walk straight when i'm in it... wahahaha... after tt went to play bowling and pool. i teached her brother how to play pool and we played 3 matches.. baobei won me in the last round. wow!! she become more power liao.. hehe... :p after playing, i become a little sad le.. cause got to go back liao... on the way back to singapore, again, everybody's slping except for her dad of course. i'm also not slping.. i was looking at dear dear slping on my shoulder. i sayang her almost thorughout the trip.. wonder she got feel it not.. i hug her tighter a little bit whenever she had sudden movements.. think she's dreaming. hehe.. wonder wat dream she had... wonder wat she's thinkin then...
thats about it for the genting trip...
dear... for the things that i've done wrong.. i hope u'll forgive me.. sometimes i really cant control wat i'm doing.. i dun mean to hurt u and stuffs.. my heart aches so much everytime i noe i make u upset.. i will think tt i'm so useless already and plus i make u sad somemore... thats y i'll feel so depress... but after all, i'll pick myslef up and be back to my own self again. i'm learning to be strong and i wont of course do anymore stupid things tt make u upset le.. if i do, i hope we'll talk things out.. if u got anythin unhappy bout me, just tell me.. dun keep quiet k? i'll tell u everythin but dun get angry after i tell u k....? baobei... ure my everythin... u really mean alot to me and i'll nv want to lose u.... not now.. not ever... believe in my love for u k....? i've nv been so devoted b4.. i want u to understand this.. i will make mistake here and there.. not only me, u will also.. every1 else makes mistakes too... but if u are willing to work things out with me and forgive each other, our relationship will be better de... really... thrust me k? i'll give u all my xing fu de....... cause everything i do for u is worth it if i can just get a tight hug from u.. see the smile on ur face everyday... and get the love from u in return.. ure the best thin that ever happen to me......................
1:48 AM
Sunday, April 23, 2006
this is for my baobei lin de... now its 5.30 am.. i'm still feeling so guilty bout wad i did just now... i'm really and truthly sorry bout that lie i lied to u... i noe i'm in the wrong.. and u have the right to give me attitude, scold me, punish me... but dun because of these, u start to think bout negetive stuffs k...? today is the 1st time i didnt send u back home... i felt so... wierd... i'm goin to see u everyday de... its not i have to.. but its i want to... u understand ma? u meant so much to me... sch starts le... there might be difference here and there... but dun worry... i'll still love u as i'm doin now.. i dun ever wanna live a life w/o u... k...? dun think bout the negative things... try not to let ur past take over u... i'll help u bring everythin back to normal so tt u can love some1 entirely again... no matter wat happen, just dun give up k? there'll surely be more and more activities for us de... our journey together will last as long as i'm alive de... i noe i'm a very useless bf... no money... no looks... just noe how to do stupid things and try make u laugh... i dun even noe how to make a lie to u... but although i'm stupid, not good lookin, and no money, i really love u alot alot... i'll work hard on everythin... have faith in me k...? i'm not as weak as i may seem.. i mean my heart.. although sometimes, i may be lost, but dun worry.. i'll pick myself up every now and then... trust me... k???
dun ever say things like u wanna have more happy memories b4 there will not be any left... our happy memories wont end de... unless its u who give me up 1st... u noe, when i read ur blog and saw how u felt and think just now, i felt kind of hurt... i'm not as unreliable as u think i might be... really...
and when u were angry with me just now, i felt so scared.. scared tt u will not forgive me... i didnt noe wat to say back then.. but i was really guilty and sad... my heart hurts whenever i tried to hold ur hand and u dun allow... i'll nv wan to have this feelin again le... and if i do lie to u next time.. i'll make a white lie.. and not somethin tt will hurt u... i noe u dun like me to promise things... tts y i say this.. my baobei yanlin... i'll try to spend every of my free time with u from now onwards.. i think i'll not meet my friends tt often anymore.. dun feel bad about it k? because, its my own free will... i want u more then anythin else... i'll still meet up with them, just tt not so often... though we're only together for around 55 days, but u've already taken up so much space in my heart le... hehe.. i'll nv let u go... nor will i hurt u like ur past...
rite now.. we've not even finish the introduction of our journey together... there'll be alot alot alot more of 'ME' to come... dun get bored of me k....? dear... rite now its 6am already... noe ure slpin soundly now... jus now talk to u till u fell aslp again... i talked quite alot while u slp... really hope u heard them... i'm for real this time... have a little more faith in our relationship k....? if u dun trust me.. at least trust ur feelings k....? it'll nv go wrong de... i really hope u can feel how much u meant to me and how much i love u... good nitez dear... see u in the mornin... i'll go take a rest now.. will wake up at 10 plus then go meet u le... k...? baobei... wan an... and i'm really sorry for today.... =
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5:33 AM